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The Art of Backstabbing

by on February 7, 2013

I don’t see myself as a backstabber.  I’m just a brutally honest person – a true self spoken bitch. I actually don’t find anything wrong about saying things that are true, or at least I think are true. But maybe I’m one of those people who don’t notice that I’m already destroying someone else’s name. I even called my close friends stupid for giving a lot of fuck and still manage to fail on everything else.

Getting away from the consequences of backstabbing is easy, well most of the time. There are some sneaky steps to escape, but they’re hard to execute. Base everything to your personality or how people see you. Like for an example, if you’re a frank person and you’re caught smearing, then you can actually make it look like you are actually front-stabbing and people will think that it’s just the way you are. The key is adaption. Not all tricks will work all the time.

You would want them to think that you actually stand in what you believe in especially those things that you say. This will not only increase your credibility, but it also can be used as a preventive method, where they will most likely believe in you. It can also be called as early hand washing, saying that you’re the type of person who is like this and not like that. For instance, I hate smokers and everyone knows it. I hate them to death, but I have friends who puff like there’s no tomorrow. So when I rant things behind their backs and they heard from somebody else that I’m saying those, they would think that I’ve already said it to them in person.

The thing that you’ll hate the most is being caught. If you won’t patch things up, you will lose most of your friends. How to psych people? Easy. Early confrontations are always good. Prolonging the days of no communication could lead to miscommunication. Don’t let other people talk to them first. It’s hard to fill a cup when it’s already full. But take it slowly. Don’t tell it all out in one blow. You will look desperate and eager to cover things up. Plan everything you’ll say but appear to be spontaneous. Don’t forget to sound apologetic. Saying sorry may be hard, but taking down your pride could gain their sympathy.

You may have a dirty mouth, but so does other people. They will all have these comments after the incident. Use those and hinted them that you feel attacked so they will have this idea that you’re not the only person who’s at fault here. Tell them that you didn’t mean it that way – that it was only your honest observation. The next thing you should do is to weigh and compare those things you’ve said and those of theirs. They actually meant what they said and you ‘didn’t’. They will look like the bad guys now.

Sometimes, you can’t just go through with it. No cards left from the deck. The more you do it, the more it will make you look unreliable and untrustworthy. You may gain authority and friends with the same habit, but with that, you will lose people that are close to you. I will admit that I lost good friends, those people that I’ve been for years, for calling them dumb and by saying how the number of times they’re having sexual interactions correlates with their stupidity. Maybe I was just insecure; maybe I was just jealous they had that experience.

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  1. The Art of Backstabbing | Of Bats and Gumdrops

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